Teachers are the worst

An interesting night of work I had this evening. We had a reservation for all the comp school teachers. All I could think was "wow I can't wait till I'm a teacher so I can be a cheap prick". Teachers are the worst. One teacher (Mrs. Cameron) was spouting off about how the Martini mixes were "all wrong...That's not how you make a classic martini." Oh really asshole and which bartender school did you graduate from? I don't go to your classroom and tell you how to teach (although I'm sure I could). I went to university for 2 years surrounded by the same people and wow...some of the most annoying people I've ever met. They're know-it-alls. Does that mean I'm becomming the thing I hate? I'm not sure. Anyways slap me if I turn that way.

After the kitchen closed at 11pm I decided it was time to smoke a bowl. I don't usually do this at work but tonight I felt it was necessary. I built a classic make-shift pipe out of a pop bottle and aluminum foil. I only took one hoot because of time constraints but it was enough. It made the last few hours of work go by much faster!

Around midnightish the Pilot showed up with a bunch of movies in his arms (the movie factory had just shut down for the evening). He bellied-up to the bar and within 2 hours was pretty fucking messed. I left him to finish his beer while I did my cash-up. When I returned there was no Pilot and his untouched drink. I figured he was in the can and went about my buisness finishing up some other work. About 15 mins later still no Pilot. I went in search of my friend and behold there he was on the floor of the bathroom hugging the john. Oh I felt bad for him. How many of us have been in this position before?

Lets just take a little time out to discuss some of the points of drinking to get drunk. (these are observations made over the course of my bartending career and are not based soley on Pilot's experience).
1. always eat something before you drink! I can't stress this enough. Don't overdo it to the point of bursting either because that's just as bad as not eating. Just have a sandwhich or something bready.
2. Pace yourself. Never do more than one shooter/hour because they are usually 1oz pure alcohol slammed back in .5 seconds.
3. Some people shouldn't mix their booze. Some people can enjoy a variety of liquers, hi-balls, beers, coolers in a night. But some people shouldn't.
4. Plan a safe ride home. (maybe this should be number 1). It gets FUCKING COLD outside in winter and you need to be prepared to walk it or have a cab/sober driver lined up.
Interesting side note: In Swift Current, when you order a cab, you can order a driver to take your car home as well.

Anyways, long story short it took Pilot an hour to get mobile (with the help of a bucket) to get him out to my car and on our way home. But It didn't bother me at all no worries!

In my next installment I'll discuss ways to avoid hang-overs most likely because it's my staff party tomorrow.

Peace Y'all